7-Week Challenge: Taking Ownership of Your Life as a Working Mom

Week four challenge for working moms

We are officially in the middle of the challenge!  7 weeks! I know it is a long challenge and we are moving through it slowly because it’s summer time!  The cool thing about the challenge is you decide how deep you want to go with it. Some weeks you might dive really deep into the bonus content and others weeks you might just listen to the episode and mentally move through the challenges.  The choice is yours. You decide what you want to get out of it and what you will take from it.

This weeks challenge….ugh, I almost changed it and made it something else.  It felt too strong. Too in your face. I mean week one, it was fun and empowering right?  You picked your theme song for the season your in. And you picked some great songs, let me tell ya.

Then week two, it was all about the lies we tell ourselves and how to replace them with truth.  And thanks to those that were bold enough to share in the facebook group becuase I could tell the spirit was really moving and revealing some powerful things.

Then last week we talked about community.  And if you missed the Facebook live that I did on it, you should go check it out.  It’s on the Your Life Rocks page and then I shared it to the group. I covered the top things/hurts/fears that hold us back from community and how to push through them.

Then I came to get everything ready for this week.  I was really stuck. I had to step away and really pray about it.  I wanted to do something fun and more light hearted because this one just didn’t feel like it would be something you would enjoy.

But then I remembered why we are doing this challenge.  To empower you to build a life you love. A life that rocks.

And this message is what it all boils down to.  It’s kind of everything we talk about at Your Life Rocks.  Everything it stands for boiled down to this one topic.

So here it is.  Want to know the most freeing thing in the world?  You are the owner of your life. You choose how it all goes.  

If you life is where you want it to be, congratulations!  You have made great choices in how you have handled this thing called life.

Not happy where you are?  Well, you own that one to.

So we are doing it.  We are talking about personal accountabliltiy for our own lives.  This week’s challenge is very straight forward. For some of you, it might be celebration week.  For others, it’s going to feel like a kick in the pants.

As always, I’m going to guide you through this process very practically step by step and I’ll outline it all in the bonus content.  Promise.

Now, let’s first say, we are not responsible 100% of the time for what happens in our life, what happens to us and the things we walk through.  We are responsible to how we respond, what we do with it and how we walk through it.

It’s about being accountable for your own personal actions.  And being accountable for your actions is a great truth....and it can be a scary one.  This is especially true as we look at the balance in your life.

Your level of personal accountability plays such a big role in how balanced your life is.  After all, the life you have is the life you created.

The best news?  If you don’t like where you are, you can choose to change.  Choose a different perspective, or choose to change the situation if you can.  

Ok, let’s dive right into the specifics of this challenge.  I’m going to walk you through a 5 step process to evaluate your ownership over your life and empower you to craft the life you want to live.

I pray that God would guide you through this process.  Just like in our Life Balance Membership Bible Study/Goal setting course, you choose to build a life aligned with God’s word and teaching for the areas of life or not.  It’s my prayer that you would choose to craft a life that honors him and his will for you and not just what your flesh desires.

When we talk about building a life you want to live it’s always with the desire that you would seek a life after God.  But again that is a choice.

Grab all the bonus content for this challenge by clicking the button below.  It's all free as a gift to you to help you build a life that rocks!

Action for Today's Challenge: Accountability

  1. List out all 8 categories of your life on a sheet of paper.  Think about what is holding you back from being where you want to be in each area.  (Faith, Marriage, Family, Career, Health, Home, Finances, Friends/Fun)

  2. Write just 1-3 obstacles that are keeping you from where you want to be for each category.

  3. Reality check!  Highlight any obstacle that you feel is out of your control.  This could be because of the actions of others or having enough time or money.

  4. I want you to pick the category that is the highest priority for you in the moment.  Pleases note that they are all high priority, but sometimes there is one category that is causing the most pain, or stress right now.  Let's work with that one.

  5. Look at the things that you highlighted for this area.  How can you take back your power? What actions can YOU do to make a difference and move you forward?

Example:  Let's say that you want to work on your marriage.  You might be thinking, "Well, it's a two-way street and he isn't doing his part.  I want more communication in our marriage, but he won't communicate." You can't change other people, but you can change yourself.  What things can you do to communicate more? How can you create space for him to communicate with you? Maybe it's asking more questions or not planning your day so full that there is no time to connect with him.  Find the action items that you can do.

Again, all of this is laid out for you in the bonus content, you can get that in three different places:

Earlier I referenced the Life Balance Membership and Setting Goals after God’s will bible study.  Life Balance Membership is currently not accepting any more enrollments as we prepare for the launch of our new app coming in August.

Existing membership content like the Bible study will be part of the Membership access of the app along with some new content that I am excited to share with you all.  So stay tuned for updates.

Hit subscribe so you don’t miss next week as we dive into week 5 of our 7-week challenge.  And until then, keep building a life that rocks.

7-Week Challenge: Cultivating Community

Working Mom Challenge

Welcome to challenge week three!  If you missed the first two, no sweat.  Each challenge week can stand alone and you can join us right here, right now.

If you want to go back to the previous challenges, that’s awesome too.  Do this one with us now….making this your week one. Then you can go back and do the others.

I recommend signing up for the bonus content if you have not done so already.  The bonus content is housed as an online course so you can easily toggle back and forth between the different weeks' challenge activities, links to helpful information and more.

You really could do this 7-week challenge over 7 days if you wanted to, but we are going slow cause it’s summer and it’s a good time to slow down a little.

This week’s challenge is about cultivating your community.  Yes, we have talked about this before. In fact, it is one of the pillars to having balance in your life.  If you are new to the show, we believe that Life Balance is possible when you have three things. 1. You put God first in your life.  Following Jesus. 2. Is community and 3 is systems.

Why is community so important?  Because when you live your life in a vacuum all your problems seem bigger than they actually are.  We become self-focused and self-consumed and it’s just not good. We were not designed to live that way.  Plus, as a working mom, we need help. We need prayer. And we need accountability from other Godly women in our lives.

Honestly, this was the hardest thing for God to teach me.  Following him, yes. All day long. I wasn’t raised a Christian so I know all too well what life feels like without him.  And systems, well after I first rebelled against them, I now know that following systems is my self-care. It makes it all work.

But community?  I am pretty self-reliant and independent.  Plus, I am an introvert...so this was a hard one for me.  Not to mention I am human and have lived. Meaning I have been hurt by people.  Deeply. So why not just live on an island (metaphorically speaking) with my family and that just be enough?  Well, a lot of reasons but let me give you 3 of what I believe are the top reasons.

  1. Biggest one... it goes against God’s will for our lives.  We were meant for community. Built for each other. Depending on others giftings is how it’s all supposed to work.  

  2. Your gift will serve others.  Sometimes we think about community through the lens of what we will get out of it.  But maybe change your perspective to think what others will get from having you in their life.  Maybe it’s getting to laugh at your sense of humor or to be encouraged by your words, or blessed by your works.  Think about how you feel when others really see you, remember what’s going on in your life, when they really listen.  You have the opportunity to treat others as you would want to be treated and seen. Other people need you. This involves you actually showing up fully.  Community is not about just collecting people or groups that fill up your time. It’s about being authentically you. Going deeper and not hiding.

  3. Prayer is powerful.  I can’t even tell you how many times I have been blessed by others praying for me.  Can I be honest? I don’t love asking for prayer. This has been hard for me even knowing how powerful it can be.  I remember when I first was in a women’s bible study and they would ask for prayer requests, I felt like if I asked for prayer I would be whining or complaining.  I didn’t want to be known for that. Like at all. God has been working with me on this one. While I will pray for everything from a clearing to merge onto the freeway to miraculous healing.  Asking for others to pray for me...that’s a different story. This is where I see pride show up in my life. You know how you get over pride? You push through it. When I don’t want to ask for prayer is when I need to ask for prayer.  Plus, if someone is going to judge you for the things you are asking prayer for, let God work on their heart. As John Crist would say, check your heart.

Here is the caveat to all this goodness.

You will get hurt.  It’s not perfect. People are not perfect.  Just as God accepts us, loves us, forgives us….we are called to do that for others.  It’s not easy but it’s in the effort of that struggle that God grows us.

So here is the challenge:

Pray about where you are with community in your life.  Let God lead you into evaluating where you are and where he wants you to be.  

Maybe you need to seek out groups to join or get involved with.  Maybe you don’t need to collect any more people. God might not be calling you to go wider in community but rather, deeper.  

How can you show up more and serve others with your talents?  I know that this might sound like it’s labor intensive or will take more of the precious time that you don’t feel like you have to give.  But what if you just went to church without the mask on. What if you didn’t just make small talk but really engaged with the people you work with?  It takes intention and guts. It doesn’t always take more time.

Maybe you need to start asking for prayer.  Ask a friend to pray for you. Ask your husband, your small group from church.  We often have times in our Facebook community where we will post what we need prayer for.  I add each of those to my Life Balance Planner each week and pray over them.

By the way, can I just say, those of you doing this challenge and sharing in our FB community….you rock!

Seriously, not only have I loved reading your experiences you are having with this challenge, you are encouraging the other members of the group too!  It’s a beautiful thing….please keep it up!

If you are not part of the community, it’s free to join click here

Bottom line, real community involves becoming real and building relationships.  

 

7-Week Challenge: The Lies We Tell Ourselves

The lies we tell ourselves

Life can be so cloudy.  It’s hard to tell what is true, and I believe we are natural truth seekers.  Think about how much chaos this can cause?

For real, here is an example.  I recently have been really focused on my health.  I’m seeking more knowledge so I can learn how to best take care of my body to function at my best.  I have been doing intermittent fasting, meaning I fast for 16-18 hours a day. There are many studies on it and doing it, I feel so much better.  Well, as many studies and positive things about intermittent fasting there are, there are just as many against doing it. I was at a work meeting and talking with my co-workers before the meeting began and I mentioned that I had been intermittent fasting and they were like “No, breakfast is the most important meal of the day!  That’s not healthy.” So what is true?

And this scale or contrast of what is true and what is a lie is outside of us.  It’s debatable. But what about the truths within us?

My internal dialogue, thoughts, and opinions can cause more confusion than anything else outside of me.  I mean, really. Have you ever over thought something so many times that you were like, I don’t even know what is true anymore?  What is right?

Ok, stay with me on this because I really think this is such a big key piece to not only finding balance by keeping yourself sane.

Can I just say that sometimes as a working mom I feel like I am losing my mind?  There are so many things going on. So many people asking for something from me, asking me questions….it gets to be too much.  And when I get to that point, it’s easy for me to believe things that are not true. Because they seem true.

We say things meant as an exaggeration, but it’s legit how we feel.  Or at least how I feel.

And friends, it’s at this point that we have a choice.  Are we going to keep throwing kindling on the fire of the crazy train or pause and seek the truth?

Last week our challenge was all about finding your groove back.  If you missed it, go back and check it out. Music is powerful.

Recently, I was flying to LA for work and I was listening to my flight playlist.  (secret about me, I have horrible flight anxiety but I travel a lot for work). One of the songs was from Casting Crowns, Here’s my heart Lord.  It was the live version. Just the course…” search my heart Lord, speak what is true.” Sometimes we have to be careful of who we are listening to for the truth.

Who knows more?  Nutrition experts or my co-workers?  The self-talk that tells me I am not enough, or the creator of all things that made me in his image?

One of the lines of the song says “I am found”.  It was this one line that triggered this week’s challenge.  I can’t tell you how many times I have told myself, “I feel lost”.

How many other things have I said like that?  

“I feel like I am not good enough.”

“I feel unloved.”

“I feel, I feel, I feel…..

Feelings are important and are from God.  But anything that contradicts the word of God is not truth.  Emotions are not truth. The exaggerated version might be the best way to explain what you are going through at that moment, but we have to recognize that it is not truth.  

When life hit you like that, allow yourself to have those feelings, move through them to see why they are there, and what caused them to come up and what you can learn from it.  But separate the emotion from the lie with the truth.

Listen to me:
You are loved
You have been found
You are seen
You are capable of doing hard things
You are smart
You were created in the image of God
You are good enough, pretty enough, kind enough…..You are enough

 

So here is the challenge for this week.

Identify your lies and replace them with the truth.

Easy right?  Yeah right.  Depending on the day you are having when you listen to this, you will either say

“I can’t think of any lies I have been telling myself.”  Or  “But what if it’s not a lie...what if I really am not enough.”

Trust me I have been in both places and sometimes in the same day.  That’s why we are doing this all week.

Keep track in your planner, on post-it notes, in your journal.  Ask God to seek your heart.

In our bonus content, I will have some thought starters for you to work through.  Schedule 30 minutes during a lunch break or after the kids go to bed to sit quietly, and pray through the list I’ll provide you.

To be honest, part of me wanted to skip the lie part of this challenge and just have you focus on the truth.  But life doesn’t work that way. We have to bring the lies into the light, look them square in the eyes and call them out.  That is a lie. Recognize it as full as not true. That way you will see it for what it really is the next time it comes back around.

Ok so we talked about identifing the lies.  

When you have found them, rebuke them.  Know that they are the weapons of the enemy to stop you.  To keep you smaller than what God plans for you. The battle is won.  Don’t let him weild his weapons on you just to mess with you. In the name of Jesus, rebuke that lie.  It has no power of you.

Next:  Focus on the truth.  What is the truth that contradicst that lie?

Write it out.  Can’t think of one?  Pray about it. Ask your best friend, or husband.  Best yet, search for bible verses about it. #truth.  Exercise what you have access to.

Last step:

Looking at your list of lies and truth.  What three seem to be the most powerful? Maybe it’s the truths that deep down you know you don’t beleive.  What are you struggeling with?

Take your top three and make them your daily affirmations.  Mediate on the truth during your prayer time. Find bible scriptures to support them.  Ask God to change your heart. Let them, along with your song from the first challenge become your anthem.  

I can’t wait to see what you all do with this challenge.  Share your thruths on social media and tag me @Yourliferocks

If you havn’t signed up for the bonus content, I hope you do.  It’s all the information you need in one spot, easy to access on your phone because, well I know how full your life is.

It’s my prayer that God would bless you in mighty ways during this challenge.  Until next week, Keep building a life that rocks.

7-Week Challenge: Getting Your Groove Back

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Work, kids, to do list, demands, sleep, repeat.  As a working mom, you are leading a very full and busy life.  Like I had to tell you that, right?

On this show, we talk a lot about habits and routines because they are the key to making it all work.  They are the success drivers of our lives. Without them, chaos ensues. If you have ever missed your weekly planning process, then you know.  If you are currently living without any systems then you really know. Chaos can drown you. When you have systems and habits, life is easier.

But, it can get boring.  Actually, as I think about it, either way, we can lose our spark.  Chaos or organized. The point is, when we are focused on what needs to get done in life, we can lose focus on actually enjoying it.

So what do we do?  We swing the balance pendulum all the way to the other side.  We start planning vacations or even just a lazy Saturday of doing nothing.  These are great, and needed. But how are you going to fill your tank back up when it’s a random Tuesday and you feel defeated and tired?

I recently rediscovered something and it has been so powerful for me, I had to include it in this challenge.  I found a way to find my groove, fill my spirit, and change my energy in 3 minutes and 56 seconds.

Now before I tell you what it is….there is something we need to address first.

Good stuff can be simple.  

You see as a busy mom, sometimes we blow right past the easy wins that we could be grabbing.  We don’t intend to, but we are moving so fast we just do.

Ok, so here is my story as an example.  I am a part of a group that I joined to help me have accountability as I get ready to bring the Life Balance app into the world.  It’s a business group and they have challenges to help you keep moving forward. It’s awesome.

Well, then the coach that is leading it starts talking about self-care.  Um, hello? I am here to learn about marketing and for accountability.  

I have issues with “self-care”. Not because I don’t think it’s important because I completely do.  But because of where our current culture has taken it. Self-care seems to have turned into self-worshipping sometimes.  It’s a justification to spend a lot of money and time on ourselves. But why is self-care important? To restore ourselves.  To fill back up so we can keep doing what God has called us to do. To keep us going. I am always searching for the more simple things that can do this for me in the most efficient way.  Afterall, if something fills my tank up but depletes that of my husband or kids…..why am I doing it?

This is why, for me, planning and sticking to my habits are self care.  Spending time with God is self-care. Choosing to eat foods that fuel me is self-care.  But I was still missing something that would be a fast spike of energy and inspiration in my soul.

Along came this challenge.  

If you listened a few weeks ago, I shared that God is currently working in me with submission.  Letting go of the pride that I know what is best and I am working on trusting and following other people.

With that in mind, I did the self-care challenge even though I didn’t want to.  It was exactly what I needed.  Just what I was searching for.

The challenge was simple.  Find a theme song that lifts you up and speaks to your soul for the season you are in.  

Simple right?  It was so effective and life giving.  

I want you to experience the same thing that I did and continue to experience as a result of this.

So here is this week’s challenge.  Find a song that gives you your groove back and walk through the steps to make it a part of you.

Sign up for the 7-Week Challenge and get all your bonus content in one place!  You won't miss a week and you can come back to the challenges again and again.  Click the button below to sign up!

 

This Week's Challenge:

  1. Decide that you will do this challenge.  It’s not that hard and because it is so simple, you might decide to just blaze right past it.  Don’t. Trust me. Once you do it, you will thank me.

  2. Pray that God will bring the right song to you.

  3. You might already have a song in mind and if you do, look it up on youtube and watch the video.  Is it still the right song? If yes, proceed. If not or if you don’t know what song you should choose, follow this process.

    • Open up a music app that you have.  I prefer Spotify but if you have apple music, google music, Pandora, or even just stay with youtube.

    • Search playlists for what you need.  Here is what I mean. I needed energy.  I actually had an idea of what my song was when I picked it.  I knew it was from Toby Mac but I didn’t know what song it was. I just knew that when I would work out, there was a song that would come on from the Christian Workout playlist that made me push harder and get my second wind.  I am currently in a very busy season and I needed that jolt like every day work out or not. I thought it was from Toby Mac but wasn’t sure. So I went to youtube and searched, and luckily it was the first song that came up and I knew!  That is it! I was flooded with emotion from the spirit and knew it was from God. So for you, it might be healing or encouragement, or whatever. Search those playlists and I am sure you will find one that fits. Then listen to the songs until one catches your attention.  Do it while you are working and you can kill two birds at once.

    • Once you have an idea of the song, go to Youtube and watch the music video.  It will help solidify if it is the song you want.

  4. Hopefully, this process won’t take to long.  Once you have selected your song. Save it, download it, and get ready to listen to it every day for the next little bit of time.  

  5. Look up the lyrics and print them out.  Reading the words will activate a different part of your brain.  

  6. Looking at the lyrics, look at what verses or words really speak to you.  Write that on a sticky note, make it a wallpaper for your phone or computer.  Let it be your reminder of the song and what you get from it.

I know this is such a simple exercise.  I truly hope you do it. It does take some time to find it, but once you do...I promise you will be glad you did.  For those that have signed up for the bonuses of this challenge, I will have playlist suggestions for you in the program.  You can find the link to everything in your email and if you are a member of Life Balance Membership, there is an icon on your home screen that will take you to all the bonus content.  In addition to the recommendations, we will have the full activity with tips for you to be successful with this week’s challenge

I would love to hear what song you picked!  Share in our Facebook group or on Instagram.  If you are not yet a member of the group, head on over to YourLifeRocks.com and click the community tab or you can search for us in Facebook.

On Instagram, share either on your story or regular.  You can share a screenshot of the show and mention your song name or an image that represents your song.  Either way, use the hashtag #createalifethatrocks

Ok so I shared the process with you, I shared my experience, and I asked you to share your song with me.  But, I just realized, I didn’t share my song with you yet. My song is Toby Mac’s I just need you.

Often I find myself saying “I need….” insert any number of things.  More hours in my day, more coffee, a hug from my husband, something to ease up at work.  Nope. I just need Jesus. He solves all my other issues. Not because he takes them away.  Because he strengthens me. He changes my perspective. He lightens the load in ways I can’t even explain.  So yeah, the music of the song makes me want to dance but the words of the song make me want to praise. It has helped me find my groove again and it is the best self-care I can do….and it takes less than 4 minutes.  

Episode 141: Balancing Career and Motherhood

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Have you found a career yet?  And is it fulfilling you, allowing you to use your gifts and perhaps to even further the Kingdom of God?  As a working mom, it can be really hard sometimes to find career guidance from a Christian perspective. We firmly believe that you can further the kingdom of God, regardless of where you are. And that God can use you, regardless of where he has planted you.

We have an expert guest, Janine Esbrand, with us today and we will be talking all about career. I am really excited about today's interview, as I was able to ask Janine some questions about the subject of careers that I have seen come up in our community. So, on the show today, we will be tackling topics that relate to how to handle a change in career with your family, how to present the change to your family, how to figure out where your strengths lie and move through everything smoothly. Listen in to find out more.

Janine is the founder of Lightbox Coaching, a coaching and consulting company which helps ambitious women to rise in their careers, beyond motherhood. Janine has an LLB Law degree from City University in London. After obtaining her degree,  she worked at a Manhattan-based law firm in New York for a year. Upon returning to the UK, she trained and qualified as a corporate lawyer at a leading UK firm. After four years of practicing as a corporate lawyer, she moved into a sole legal counsel role at an International Fuel Company. Alongside her career, Janine trained as a life and career coach, to be able to help others on a more personal level. She loves spending time with her family, podcasting, and traveling! Janine really knows what it is like to grow her career, set goals, have ambition and get it all done! Listen in today to find out what she has to share about balancing your career ambition with having a family!

 

 

Episode 140: When Lack of Balance is a Heart Issue

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Do you struggle to find balance in your life? Or to maintain it when you do find it? I really like to keep things streamlined so I love it when you can leave the show with three steps, or maybe five tips to create more balance in your life. This is just where the systems that allow you to grow and experience more balance come into place. Listen in to find out more!

Our episodes about systems do tend to make things tangible, clean and actionable, but unfortunately, life just isn't that clean, nor is it a simple check-list with some easy-to-apply steps to attain balance. If only it was so simple! Many of us find that we have balance for a moment, but then it goes and we find ourselves right back in the mess that we started in. This happens to so many of us so often, even with the best of intentions, and the reason for this is because there is a heart issue playing out. These heart issues usually have to do with one of the first two Pillars of Balance, and sometimes, but not always with the third.  

On the show today I will share with you a very personal heart issue that God recently revealed to me because we all have heart issues and all of us struggle in this area. I really hope that there's something in my story that might encourage you and that you will gain from this, even if your own heart issue is very different to mine. Listen in today to hear what I have to share with you.

"We all need to be responsible and accountable for ourselves - especially if we want to grow."

 

Verse of the Week

Romans 12:2

“Don't conform any longer to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of the mind.”

 

 

 

Episode 139: Becoming Financially Literate About Investing

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Episode 138: Making Magical Summer Moments Around Your Work Schedule